Job 32:8 – There is a Spirit in man; and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding.(KJV)
I grew up in a low income family, with little or no access to the luxuries of life. My parents worked really hard and sometimes had to borrow to make ends meet. I on the other hand, was what some people would describe as a chubby girl. I did not fit into the mold of what people call “attractive” today. My physical features and financial situation soon made me feel inferior and inadequate. I remember looking in the mirror many times and wishing I had a nose like X or an arm like Y. I simply hated myself and this led to deep feelings of worthlesness.
These negative feelings made me stay in relationships where I was direspected and mistreated because, I felt I was even lucky to have those individuals in my life. Afterall, who would want to be with someone like me? I thought. I often sabotaged many good opportunities and relationships because I felt they were too good for me.
My mother was a devout christian, who taught our family the word of God, and the importance of seeing ourselves through God’s eyes. For some reason however, her counsel on this never got through to me, until the 5th of February 2017, when she passed away right before me. We were chatting excitedly in the vehicle while on a trip, when we suddenly had a fatal road accident. As I carried her lifeless body on my laps, it dawned on me that my “real” mum, was the spirit which had departed. Her body was merely a covering or rather a suit, which her spirit wore to be able to operate in this world. Her body could no longer speak, laugh, love, counsel or hug me, like she used to. As the bible puts it in Jam 2:26 – For as the BODY without the SPIRIT is dead..
Then, I finally received this life changing insight; I AM NOT MY BODY! I had spent all these years mainly focusing on my body and circumstances rather than the real “Judith”, who is fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. This realization completely changed my life. Yes, my body is important and I must care for it because it houses the Holy Spirit and I here on earth. However my Spirit is much more important. The bible says in Prov 18:14 – The Spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity, but a wounded spirit who can bear. This means that if my Spirit is weak everything about my life will be affected. However if my body is weak or disabled in any way but my spirit stays strong, I can still go on to do great things in life. Now, I love myself so much and I never want to be like anyone else!
I pray in Jesus name, that the Lord will also cause you to see yourself through his eyes. You never have to feel inferior or worthless ever again!
I have begun caring for and building up my Spirit. I am now stronger, confident, joyful, peaceful and happier than I have ever been. In my next post I will be sharing how I have been building myself.
God bless you!
( Further study – Luk 8:55, 23:46, 24:39, Jn 3:6, Rom 8:16, 1cor 14:14, 15:44)